Mumbo Jumbo in a white coat

Written by

Andrew Millar


October 24, 2011

On the weekend I wandered into a new shop in the local area. And immediately felt a need to back out slowly through the door, turn and run at full pace down the road.

Yes I had early warning signs. I had stumbled into something way too Amway for my liking.

But this blog is not going to be a rant about eCosway and the evils of MLM – multi-level marketing – which eCosway claim not to be… To quote ‘We are not an MLM – multi-level marketing organisation, we are an MLM – a mutual-level marketing organisation’. That’s like saying eCosway is a not an elevator but a ‘staircase alternative which puts you in control of whether you descend like a negative minded looser further into the depths of persecution by ‘Mr BIll’ who keeps knocking at your door asking for money or the choice to climb to the lofty heights of wealth beyond that which you clearly deserve.’ There is enough of that on-line if you want to read the laughable zealots spiel and and the realist’s arguments.

No. Today I just wanted to point out how clever some of their product marketing was. These guys know their target audience well.

Take for example “Bioglo BodyLite Thermo-Active Body Shaping Gel”. This product, according to the Specials Catalogue I swiped during my hasty retreat, promises to “melt away” your body fat. Is there anyone who actually believes that you can apply a gel of chilli pepper, essential oils, fruits and herbs to your skin and you will lose weight? Well the answer is, sadly, yes. And it is the same deluded people who believe a Ferrari will be mine in minutes if I sign up to be come a BO. (Code for Business Owner in eCosway terms.)

And here’s another beauty. The SE Pendent 0352 “is an energy accessory that has been proven by reputable bodies to emit Far Infrared Rays (FIR) and scalar energy. It facilitates the conductivity & flow of Bio-Energy with the presence of germanium and invigorates the mind & body with its abundant negative ions.” eCosway’s web site doesn’t say who the ‘reputable bodies’ are. Of course not, but it does claim to the affect of wearing the pendent, including: improving your gold (sic) swing, making students more alert, increasing your metabolism and keeping your body trim and helping people with aches and pains. **

The truth is the pendant is under investigation by the Department of Health in Hong Kong. It was found to contain radioactive thorium-232 and uranium-238. Levels in the pendant were both above the limit recommended by the International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA) for commodity products. To quote them ‘short term contact with the pendant would not result in immediate effect to health. As the radiation dose from a single pendant may reach 50% – 60% of the annual skin dose limit recommended by the International Commission on Radiological Protection, year-long contact with the pendant may result in erythema of the skin in some individuals. The risk of skin cancer also increases with the duration of contact.”

But short term exposure may be all you get as the neck string it comes with looks very dodgy indeed.

So eCosway not only offers miracle cures for my financial woes, it can improve my life, my golf swing and my waste line without me having to contribute anything. And the scary part is they use pseudo-science to sell it.

In short, the same people who believe eCosway’s claims of untold riches falling from heaven would believe eCosway’s evil product claims. Not one to promote a Nanny State, but where are the regulators, the checkers, the protectors of the innocently stupid and gullible when you need them?

But eCasway isn’t the only organisation to dabble in a little white coated mumbo jumbo to sell something useless. Take e-Products Online who, through Spreets, are trying to sell me a ‘Power Washball’ which it is claimed ‘offers 1500 washes with no need for powder or detergent to get my wash white and clean’. The ball works ‘by utilising special ceramic grains – including antibic alkali, far infrared ray/negative ion – and permanent magnets.’ I would say what a load of hogwash if it wasnt for the presence of ‘Far Infrared Rays’ … the same stuff the Hong Kong Department of Health has a problem with. Yes, I’d love the chance to irradiate my children’s clothes.

What in us rational, supposedly intelligent beings is so easily sucked in by seeming miraculous, exotic or sexy cure-alls. Why do we not remain healthily skeptical about the products of a direct mailing house?

Take these claims with a big pinch of salt*…

*But make your skepticism healthier with Natural French Sea Salt from eCosway. But because too much of anything is bad for you, especially regular table salt which is high in sodium chloride. It has been proven that a diet rich in sodium chloride can cause or aggravate high blood pressure and seriously affect your health. Now, there is a lower sodium chloride alternative! Nn Natural French Sea Salt is salt from France that is all natural, hand harvested and sun-dried. It not only has less sodium chloride, but it also contains over 80 essential trace minerals that can replace the minerals lacking in our diets.

** The eCosway site now does name some weird organisation as the reputable body but have a look at this if you want a laugh I love the testimonial from the guy in Victoria who put 6 pendants around a bottle of cheap whiskey and in 20 hours it didn’t taste like cheap whiskey at all!